dear mom: even after all of this,
things are ok here. portland is always
more sun than i think it’ll be; isn’t
it strange how that happens? i hope
you’re well. did you know,
one of my friends has pianist
fingers too? she works in the sun all day
turning graveyards into gardens & clearing spaces
for the lungs of trees. she tells me about it
sometimes, of the dirt and the sweat, the sweaty
dirt, all of it oh all the staccato stumble of rain as it
strums and plucks its way back to the ocean.
of the furry creatures that curl up
in dark homes. how it feels to hold the
spine of the cascades like an open book and how,
more often than not, she’s the one being held.
so tell dad that there’s more than one way
to be a doctor. this canyon is the closest thing
i’ve come to healing. i scrape my knees on the distance
too often and know that no matter what you wish
i am still your daughter—these hands are half yours
and i’ve turned them into fists; you say
there was a garden here once too and it is
gone but here it is safe, mom,
here it is high up in a jar on a shelf in my closet
praying to god i won’t break it too